I AM Ready For Wealth - Big FAT 0

Meditate on your abundance and give thanks for all your blessings tonight.

Tone your usual pace down a few notches -- or decibels, as the case may be. You need peace, quiet and time to contemplate right now. Yoga might be nice.

Warrior Mars harmonizes with dreamy Neptune in your 12th House of Spiritual Mystery, making it next to impossible for you to figure out a logical solution. Instead, trust your intuition to bring you the answers that you need.

Not everyone can welcome prosperity. You have a clear conscience, and you've gone without. You are ready for wealth and it is coming your way.

No intuition, no prosperity, no yoga. I'm feeling seriously out of it.

Meditate and the Money Will Come 0

If you try to stick to a schedule today, you’ll meet with blocks at every turn. Meditation builds a stronger connection to the Universe, so devote more time to spiritual practices today. Watch the mail for a letter with money in it whether you're expecting one or not. Your tarot card, the Lovers, will attract wonderful new people into your world who will support and encourage your dreams.

Oh, Horoscope, you NEVER deliver money when you say you will. Though I notice you are not "promising" - just telling me to watch for it. Perhaps the wonderful new people will show up in the mail instead. Wouldn't that be a trick?!

NO money, NO supportive new friends. Horoscope, promises like this are what you get you a bad rep.

Will it fit in a cupholder? 5

Meditate under the Gemini Moon to discover a quicker path to your dreams, and expect to receive ideas about a few new goals you'd like to add to your list.

I would LOVE a quicker path to my dreams. In fact, I'm on the hunt for the Ambien of Goal Manifestation. Make it happen faster, faster, faster!! I'm ready to do the work right now, bring on the money, the accolades, the glory!

But more goals? Seriously. I haven't achieved the goals I set in Kindergarten yet and I've only accrued more each year. I feel like Earl with the damn list. Doesn't he seem like he should be done with it by now? But he keeps adding more things to it - and that is when I want to scream at the television "See! You are STILL a dumb ass! Stop adding more and you'll be done!"

So while I love receiving ideas.... and I do, I'm a HUGE fan of ideas.... I am at capacity. There is no more room in my head, no more time in my day.

But I will make you a deal, Gemini Moon (you again?), here is your challenge: send me an idea I can accomplish while carpooling to skating and I'll do it.

P.S. I didn't get any ideas last night. Though I have to admit that "meditation" was really me just lying there with my eyes closed until I fell asleep. But while I was sleeping my friends were getting ideas for me and they were all waiting for me in my email inbox this morning. Very sneaky, Gemini Moon, very sneaky!