If today is your birthday

You will make powerful connections with those who will love you or help you move to the next level in your career! Your family thrives because of your help through the fall. Gemini and Libra people adore you.

Thank you Geminians and Libras! I adore you too!

If you compare where you were a year ago with where you are now, you'll realize that you’ve accomplished some amazing things.

Um, ok. This time last year I had no job. Now I have about 8. Ok, they're all part-time but they are pretty fun. I don't know if they're amazing....you know what, they ARE amazing!

That feeling of rightness isn't just a fluke. It's the universe's way of letting you know that all is going as it should. Convey that feeling to the authorities.

Do I write a note? Or send a balloon bouquet?

I know you are but what am I? 0

You sharpen your skills as your engage in battle with the enemy. But wait -- the relationship is changing before your eyes. Who you thought was your enemy is really your ally.

OK, who over the age of 9 has an "enemy"? And who am I battling? I don't recall any combat today, there wasn't even a scuffle with the teenage boy who walked backwards out of the grocery store right into Son and I.

I can't think of anyone I dislike enough to fight with. Oh, I can think of people I dislike, but I don't feel strongly enough about them to argue, let alone fight. The strongest feeling I have about anyone I've ever disliked is pity. At the end of the day they have to go home and live with themselves.

And that 'scope sounds like something from a bad movie. I'm picturing someone doing battle with their Enemy. They are fighting Ninja-style, and as they punch and kick and gouge each other the Enemy starts morphing into their best friend and they fall into each other's arms sobbing. In my mind this movie is starring Jean Claude Van Damme or Steven Seagal, I have no idea why.

Why is my horoscope for today a bad movie plot? Now I'm wishing I hadn't just ripped the little Pisces paragraph out of the paper; I'd love to check out the rest of the 'scopes and see if anyone got an Oscar-winning plot line. It was probably Libra. They get everything.