Go left, no go right! - 10

The voices in your head, whether spirit guides or your own, can be sending you conflicting messages today. It's hard to know exactly what to believe and what to do with so much mental turmoil.

Ah, so much turmoil. I nearly had a panic attack this morning.

If the number of books on the topic is any indication, I'm not the only with negative voices in my head. Oprah has covered the topic ad nauseum. And why do we listen to the negative voices when they are in our head? Had an argument over dinner with Husband who insists that no one is going to give me $200,000 to make a documentary. I was incredibly mad at him for being so unsupportive. I even said that, "You are so unsupportive!" But when it's ME saying it to me, well, I listen and agree.

You're probably wondering what happened to the Eternal Optimist who was blogging here just 48 hours ago. Frankly, so am I. Negative Stacey has beaten her into submission and she is cowering in a corner, holding her dreams tightly lest they be wrenched from her arms and tossed in the garbage.

Negative Stacey reminds me of British Mom. British Mom is just me with a British accent, but Husband and the kids like it and beg me to do it all the time. One night, when I must have been in a cranky mood, the kids begged for British Mom. "She's so much nicer," said Husband. "Really?" I responded in the begged-for accent, "Cuz she thinks you're all quite stupid."

Any change to spare? 6

You'll realize change is definitely in the air when the Pisces Moon challenges your boundaries today.

Change must be in the air. Today I got a call from a casting agency about auditioning for a television pilot.

I know. Seems ridiculous doesn't it? I feel a little old to be "discovered" and I don't live anywhere near L.A., yet here is an opportunity, mine for the taking.

And what was I thinking when I sent in my resume and headshot via internet on Sunday afternoon? Was I thinking that it wasn't real? That there would be no show? That it would be some rinky-dink production? It's none of those things. It's real, it's big, it's .... it's the coolest job opportunity ever!!

When my cell phone rang this afternoon and I didn't recognize the number I let it go to voicemail. (Yes, I'm a screener -sue me). I recognized the Chicago area code, but thought it might be some sort of sales call until the double beep alerted me that a message had been left. Got Son off the bus, into the house and fed, then called voicemail to listen to the message. I have to be honest, while the line was ringing I was actually thinking 'It's Oprah. I wonder what she wants? Maybe someone showed her my book.'

I guess I'm an eternal optimist. It obviously wasn't Oprah. It was a casting agent. But that doesn't mean Oprah won't call ..... some day.

The nothingness continues ... 10

Don't worry if you don't get much done today; your energy will start to pick up again in a few days, thanks to your tarot card for this week, the Sun.

I wonder if it's possible to do less than watch a small town parade and then sit by the pool. Maybe if I hadn't left the house, I could have gotten less accomplished. But today was the perfect today to not do anything. Sunny, warm, gorgeous. We dropped Son off at the parade start to ride the Cub Scouts wagon, then set up our chairs in the last shady spot along Beverly Rd. Some friends joined us and Husband taught the kids how to whistle using a blade of grass. Both of the kids won goldfish at the fair (terrific) then we changed and headed to the packed swim club. Husband made dinner and we ate outside.

A perfect day. So glad I didn't try to do anything.

Someone's peeking into the windows to my soul - 10

You have personal chores to do at home and enough desire to start a creative project. Unfortunately, whatever you begin now will be hard to keep on track tomorrow.

This morning I started really working on the documentary proposal and accompanying website. Very fun. Then Husband came home from golfing, ate lunch, then headed to the yard to put down the rest of the mulch commenting snarkily as he headed out the door "Sure would be nice if this house were clean." Yes, it would be nice. So, I did my chores, but never did stop thinking about my 'creative project.'

Not so thrilled that it will be hard to keep on track tomorrow (I'm assuming that since the first part was true that the second part will be as well. I think I learned that as a theorem in high school). Though tomorrow is Memorial Day and we have a parade to attend and the swim club will be open and it's supposed to be 80 degrees. Wonder if the weather guy is as accurate as my horoscope?

Just doing my duty - 10

Family issues can distract you now from other things you want to do. Parental duties may be required.

Today I was Angry Mom. Daughter had a sleepover last night and she and her friends wanted to go to the mall. I know, it was a gorgeous day outside and they wanted to go indoors and look at clothes they can't afford and drink Frappachinos! I have one rule with Daughter when she is out with friends and no parents, she MUST answer her cell phone.

I ran out to do some errands then called her phone to let her know she'd have another 40 minutes because I had take the groceries home. No answer. Tried again. No answer. No answer. No answer. No answer. No answer. I turned the car around and headed towards the mall, hanging up and redialing every time I heard the beginning of her obnoxious outgoing message with her and her friends screaming into the phone. No answer. No answer. No answer.

I parked at the mall. In the last spot; who would have thought it would be packed on a gorgeous day of a holiday weekend? Redialed and she finally answered. I said "Get to the south entrance in 2 minutes or you are grounded for a month." Went back to the car, picked her up.

I was so mad I could barely see straight. I had been so worried for the half hour that she didn't answer and all that panic was trying to escape as seething anger. She apologized, swore her phone had been sitting right besides her the whole time.

I calmed down quickly, I knew she really was sorry. And I know she knew, but I told her anyway that I was angry because I had been so frightened. Though I think I scared her friends.

But enough about me

Today a Denver Post columnist, William Porter, wrote about the United Astrology Conference held in Denver this week and the panel of seven astrologists that agreed that Obama would win the Presidential election based on his birth chart. Astrologers starry-eyed for Obama - The Denver Post

Mr. Porter, who admittedly does not believe his horoscope is anything more than "vague advice" describes the conference attendees as "breathless," "worried," and "ominous." His article is snarky, slightly condescending, and hilarious. My favorite quote is from one of the astrologists who admits that he doesn't have a correct birth chart (how can you NOT find out Obama's birth date/time these days?) and that without it, everything he says "might be garbage." Garbage? Really? I find it difficult to believe that if I'm born at 2:30 a.m. I'm a homicidal maniac, but if it's 2:30 p.m. I'm the next leader of the Free World.

I saw the story on an AOL news slide. Right below the Obama/horoscope article was an article about a 19-year old man in South Carolina who won the Powerball by listening to the "voices in his head." "19-year-old S.C. man wins $35 million Powerball jackpot" : News-Record.com : Greensboro, North Carolina

The voices told him that "your family is going to bring you success and fortune" so he used the ages of his siblings to pick the winning numbers.

OK, fortune I can see. But success? All he's really successful at is getting lucky. And being smart enough to pay attention and listen when the voices in his head tell him to play the lotto, and not to listen when they tell him to shoot up the quad.

Credit where credit is due - 3

The Sagittarius Moon will bring out your creative side, which may inspire a poem, song or artwork.

I was inspired tonight, but by an essay class led by Cindy LaFerle not the Sagittarius Moon. I came home with a few new essay ideas and a new beginning for my chapter book that popped into my head while I sat at a red light.

But what's with all the credit-grabbing in my 'scopes lately? Two days ago it was the Gemini Sun and today the Sagittarius Moon. Hey, if you're going to claim credit for inspiring me you need to send me something better than a few essay topics or some bad, self-applied highlights. I want something BIG!

I realize that Sag Moon can use "may inspire" as a fallback. "I didn't promise anything," I can imagine Sag Moon saying. "I said I may inspire you." Do the planets all have lawyers now? Is someone advising them not to promise too much, they might get sued for breach of promise?

Don't be a wuss, Sag Moon. If you want me to write a song, send me a piano!

Oops I did it again - 6

You'll thrive under the versatile energy of the Gemini Sun, and may make sweeping changes to your appearance or surroundings.

The changes weren't sweeping, but they were necessary. Enough gray had grown in that it was obvious what my well-placed highlights were hiding. The highlights, expertly applied by Kendall, had come with a warning to never try and highlight my own hair again. But there I was in the bathroom with the plastic gloves, pieces of foil and a little brush. I thought I did a decent, conservative job but when I went down to dinner Husband said "I can still see gray, right there at your part."

He's so helpful.

I was going to leave it. Really. But the solution was still on the bathroom counter and I had an hour until our ride to the skating audition showed up. Before I knew it I was upstairs running the little bristle brush through my grayer spots. Rinsed it out after 15 minutes, re dried the front of my hair and set out.

The gray is definitely gone and Husband gave his approval but I'm worried that it looks too blonde (I know, as if there is such a thing!). This never would have happened if I'd called weeks ago and made a hair appointment like a normal person. I can't seem to get out of the pattern of ignoring it until the new gray roots are as obvious as a hat on my head and calling in a panic to be squeezed in for an appointment. I don't think I'm teaching Daughter good Hair Habits.

Too blonde?

Show me the money - 0

Green gemstones like emeralds or jade will draw money to you in surprising ways, so wear or carry some today.

Wore my jade ring all day yesterday and if money was drawn to me in surprising ways it was so surprising that I didn't even recognize it. No checks in the mail, no job offers, no agents begging for my book.

Money has been an issue lately, too. Husband has been struggling with a job decision and said that it would be easier if I were working. I am working, just not making a lot of money at it right now. And it's the wrong time to start looking for a job because all summer I spend my time driving the children from skating to swimming to golf.

I need more freelance work. I'm trying to think positively and not desperately, but I feel like the Universe recognizes me for the overly-made-up-low-cut-top-wearing-desperate-not-to-go-home-alone job seeker that I am.

Floating along - 8

As a water sign, you inherently understand that life changes form, flows in new directions and is constantly shifting. You float with whatever comes.

This was from yesterday. And I tried to be a good little Pisces and float along with all the changes and shifting and flowing, but I don't feel like I'm doing a very good job. There are so many "if then's" in my life right now that I feel trapped in Indecision Land. (It's an actual place, get out your Atlas!).

I feel like my life has become all about coordination. An example: I am trying to figure out a summer skating schedule for Daughter. But I have to consider A) coach's schedule, B) ice time offered C) Son's swim team schedule and D) Daughter's volunteering. I feel like I have one of those hard plastic red-and-blue toys that Tupperware used to sell for toddlers. The one where they had to slide the triangle shape into the triangle slot - EXACTLY - or it wouldn't go in. (Now that I think about it, what a frustrating toy to give a kid, it was nearly impossible). I am trying to put every shape perfectly into its exact slot all at the same time.

Am I whining about something that everyone else does on a daily basis without even thinking about? I probably am. But how are you people doing it? What is your secret? How are you not walking around in a constant state of ready-to-implode?

Or maybe you are. That could explain road rage.

A Jeep full of Wonderbread - 2

The advice of others may not be quite so reliable, but you'll easily wade through what's legit and what's not -- as long as you pay attention to the signs along the way.

I believe I did see a sign today, but I have no idea what it means.

I drove over to Clinton Township (during rush hour!) to emcee the Girl Scouts of Macomb County Women of Distinction awards for the second year in a row. I A) don't live in Macomb County, B) was not a Girl Scout (though Daughter was for a year or two) C) am not a Woman of Distinction, but for some reason they like me to emcee their event, probably because I do it for free and can ad lib when the microphone quits or the stage is full of giggling, antsy 9-year old girls. I was running late, as usual, and had to park at the far end of the parking lot of the Fern Hill Country Club near the signs that say "Park at your own risk. Not responsible for damage to cars by golf balls." I don't think these signs really show a lot of confidence in their golfers, but that's not for me to judge. I passed a long row of cars on my walk in and one of them was a Jeep full of Wonderbread. I mean FULL of Wonderbread! There were so many loaves of Wonderbread that it would be impossible for the driver to see out of the back windows and the back seat was nearly full.

Now I'm sure that if I'd seen a Jeep full of Wonderbread in a dream some highly evolved dream interpretation expert would be able to tell me exactly what it means. But I was awake. And it was still daylight. The familiar wrapper, white with red and blue stripes, stood out through the back window like a clown at a bank.

I'm aware that grocery prices have risen like crazy lately; but what would make a person panic and fill their Jeep with loaf after loaf of Wonderbread? Even if it was on sale - or free! - where would you store that many loaves and how long would they last (or maybe I don't want to know the answer to that.)

Since I was at a golf course I wondered if maybe there is a new and interesting way to use Wonderbread to lower one's golf score.

Or...maybe that particular Jeep doesn't have airbags and the soft, squishy loaves are there for protection in case of an accident.

So, back to the "sign" thing. Is someone hoarding hundreds of loaves of Wonderbread an omen? Does it signal the imminent end of the world? Should I be buying up bottled water and batteries? And if the Wonderbread-filled Jeep owner has this information, shouldn't they be sharing it with the rest of us?

Back-up singer - 9

Make a back-up plan for this evening to accommodate unexpected changes in direction.

I am the Queen of back-up plans. No really. I don't know if it's because I never expect to get what I want so I always have the next-best-thing ready to go, or if I'm channeling my inner Girl Scout.

I wasn't always this way, and I can't quite recall when it started though I'm sure it had something to do with my children. Can't have disappointed children, for Pete's sake, better have another plan waiting in the wings. It could also be the part of my personality that hates to disappoint people. You don't like my song and dance? Fine, how about this tune?

I think we would all be better off if everyone had back-up plans. Think about it: what if G.W. had a back-up plan "in case" no weapons of mass destruction were found? What if Michigan had had a back-up plan "in case" most of the Democratic candidates pulled out of our new primary date? What if Kwame...well, what if Kwame had paid for his own freakin' PDA?

I still get surprised by life, but am rarely without a way to turn. Husband used to say that my method of doing things was to spray bullets at the wall and hope that one of them hit the target. Now I don't use as many bullets, I have more targets.

And in case you're wondering, I did have a back-up plan for tonight. Husband had to work late so Son had to attend the figure skating club banquet with Daughter and I because I just couldn't find anywhere to park him. Fed him his favorite foods for dinner, stuffed his pockets full of Star Wars Lego's and got him juice and bread. Told him I would take him home if he got too absolutely bored/tired, but Husband came through and picked him up so I could enjoy the rest of the banquet. I was prepared to leave and beg someone to give Daughter a ride home, but didn't need to. I can save that back-up plan for use at a later date.

Idealism - 9

If you're caught up in confusion, it's because your ideals are clashing with reality.

and ....

Keep your standards up. Hold others accountable.


Daughter has been auditioning for skating teams, and I am incredibly confused. How can I put her on a team whose ethics don't agree with ours? What do I tell her about friends who are saying one thing to her face and the opposite behind her back? What do I do when rumors are spread about me even though I have been nothing but open and honest about my actions?

How do you raise children with integrity in a world where people do nothing but lie and deny? Where people are "famous" for being idiotic? How do you teach them to do the right thing so they will feel better about themselves at the end of the day .... only to see, at the end of the day, the cheaters being rewarded?

Here's the hardest part: How do you raise children to respect authority when the people in authority are the biggest idiots? Son is 7 and he thinks a Mayor is like a Sheriff (thanks to SpongeBob, I'm pretty sure). Thankfully he is unaware of the Mayor of Detroit's texting scandal - and various other scandals.

Maybe we were better off in the 50's and 60's when the press were in on hiding the fact that the President had lovers or was ill. Maybe there are some things we are just better off not knowing.

I left a job recently because of the inexcusably inconsistent, erratic, and ugly behavior of a Person in Authority. I listened for months while PiA badmouthed everyone who currently or formerly worked with the organization. I watched as PiA made decisions based solely on protecting his own interests, not for the good of the organization, yelled, threw tantrums and bullied. When I was finally tired of being accused and abused (and I put up with it much longer than I should), I left. I am afraid to look for another job. I'm afraid of the situation happening again. I'm afraid there is no one left with integrity.

My ideals are high standards and fairness for everyone. Reality is quite the opposite. Of course they are clashing.

Need a penny, take a penny. Have a penny, leave a penny. - 3

Put a penny in your shoe or pocket for a boost of power and luck today.

I had no idea that power and luck were that cheap!

Could have used both today. Could have used both all week. Have been feeling both powerless and unlucky. Not continuously. There have been great moments of joy and creativity and fun and pride. But Husband has been working a lot and Daughter's schedule has been crazy and I spent 2 hours at an orthopedic surgeon's office yesterday morning, and that is seriously enough to make anyone depressed. And when I asked the Dr. (after waiting nearly 2 hours to see him) if my disks have any hope of healing, he said "Maybe in 5-10 years."

I'm exhausted and frustrated and taking things personally that aren't.

I'm tired of hypocrites and liars.

But I did see a rocking production of Willy Wonka Jr. tonight and Daughter did a beautiful job and Son was so impressed with his big sister. I need to stop thinking and start enjoying.

Can my life get a ticket for speeding? - 10

Your daily rhythms are speeding up, even if your life is already busy.

If my life got any busier I'd need a twin. As it is I'm trying to be in two places at once most of the day. Totally missed Son's baseball game. Though I think he's a little tougher when I'm not around (boy I hate to admit that).

Spent most of my afternoon/evening working my cranky out on 60 Oompa Loompas from the middle school play. One little (insert bad word here) was giving me attitude because I wouldn't let her take her cell phone on stage! Luckily Daughter spends most of her time onstage or backstage on the other side and didn't view my tyrant behavior, though I'm sure she'll hear about it at school tomorrow.

Tomorrow is more of the same. Appointments, meetings, rehearsals, and the 1st grade Egypt play and it just continues on through the rest of the week and next.

I was reading some other Astrology Blogs today and read the most interesting one about how Pluto, though not a real planet, has done a darn fine job predicting the sexual scandals of A) the church then B) government. I can't help but be curious as to who is next!

A welcome rest - 10!

Every now and then, you're in the perfect astrological position to make your dreams come true. This is your time. All you have to do is stop searching. Let things unfold as they will. You can't help but find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

After an exhausting ice show weekend (no, I wasn't skating, just volunteering) I was too tired to 'scope last night, but couldn't help checking yesterday's this morning.

This horoscope couldn't be more welcome! Stop searching?! Hooray! I really don't have time for searching in my calendar this week anyway. And I'm looking forward to my pot of gold!

Report Card - 6

Avoid sharp objects, volatile situations and all machinery that you really don't have to touch. Keep your hands to yourself and no trouble will ensue.

I love it when I get a horoscope that is basically just good everyday advice. Isn't all this on that list of Things I Learned in Kindergarten? So, let's see if I was a good girl ...

Sharp Objects - Fail - Chopped apple:, used forks, pencils, pens, chopsticks and other pointy, potentially-dangerous instruments.

Volatile Situations - Fail - Got into a discussion with a friend over a shared situation where we both have strong, opposing beliefs. At times I just wanted to hang up, I hate to argue and I especially hate to argue with friends. Got through it, but I'm not sure it accomplished anything except teach me that maybe we can disagree about things and still be friends. Maybe I'll give myself a Fail +.

Machinery I Don't Really Have to Touch - Pass - Vacuum sitting in foyer, walked right by it.

Keeping Hands to Myself - Pass - No explanation necessary.

No Trouble - Pass - As far as I know.