You're the one that I want - whoever you are! 2

Many people want to help you, but only one will really be able to provide what you need. You know that person the minute you see him or her.

No, I don't! So if you are the person who can provide what I need please introduce yourself. Or wear a shirt that says "Pssst, Stacey - it's me!" Anything!

And the rest of you who want to help - don't let this horoscope discourage you! Jump right in and give me directions/assistance/orders/gifts/money. I promise you will not be turned down!

I'm all business 9

A business partnership with a friend, lover, spouse, or a woman is bound to be profitable. This also promotes a love of partnerships and a desire to associate with those of means.

So glad to hear that! Spent the morning with Jill (a friend and a woman!) working on our new business partnership and think it is going to be fabulous. I'm not even thinking about where I'm going to find the time to pull it off because the idea came (tho to be fair it came to Husband, not me), and the stuff we need came, and I'll just have to believe that the time will come too.

I do have a love of partnerships and a desire to associate with those of means! Especially if they are sharing those means!

Does zero count as a level? 9

Energy levels will bounce back in just another day or so. Concentrate on creative ideas and use patience.

Oh Thank God because I have NO energy and lots of creative projects that I need to get to work on.

If you've missed me, that's where I've been -- catching creative ideas as they come falling from the sky around me. Caught an agent, a new business, a new website to create, an event to plan, and a potential voice over gig. This is what happens when you tell the Universe you want to be really busy with really fun projects.

Take responsibility for what you create in your world by realizing that the way you think determines how things show up in your life. Also, you may find yourself working hard during this period at some mental project.

Yikes! This is exactly what I've been thinking today as I realized that I asked for all these aforementioned (isn't that cool how I snuck in a legal term?) things. Though I'm wondering which project is the "mental" one. Or maybe I'm the mental one.

Is aforementioned really a legal term? Probably not, huh?

Everything old is new again - right? Please? 2

New ideas that come to you via the Internet or a friend could keep you up late, contemplating your options for the future.

So it's late (for me) and I've been online for a while and even heard from an old friend and still have NO ideas about my future. I mean, I have the same old ideas I've been having - write a couple books, sell a couple million books - but nothing newer than that.

There's no longer a sufficient reason for you to surrender your power and attempt to please everyone at the cost of your own happiness. Let others know how you feel, even if the consequences of your declaration may be temporarily challenging.

Hmmm. I thought I was being discouraged from the selling opportunity that presented itself then suddenly - without warning - it popped back up as something I "should" be doing. But I really don't want to. I want to write. And I'd like to let "others" know how I feel, but instead I am letting the calls go to voicemail because I am a wuss. Do I have to let others know how I feel? Can't I just pretend to sell stuff for a while then pretend it didn't work out?

God is in the details and apparently He's got it out for me 4

Although you may choose to focus your attention on the details, it's these same details that spell defeat for you. To the contrary, steer yourself toward big ideas, sound judgments and amazing adventures.

Do you remember on Sesame Street how they used to sing that song that went "One of these things just doesn't belong here, one of these things just doesn't belong!" and they would show 2 monsters and a piece of pie and all the four year olds at home would scream "pie!" at the TV?

I kinda feel that way about big ideas, sound judgments, and amazing adventures, with 'sound judgments' being the pie of the mix. Wouldn't sound judgment bring an end to most big ideas and amazing adventures? Maybe I'm just not having the right big ideas.

And what are the small details that are going to defeat me? I'm trying to think of any small details I focused my attention on today...brushing my teeth, tying my shoes, answering my email. I bet it's the email. I seem to spend a ridiculous amount of time dealing with email these days. But my email brought good, big-picture news today!

Confused. Confused. Send clearer messages, please.

Guess again 3

Avoid making any major purchases and put on a pair of your comfiest jeans. Who are you trying to impress? It's the right day to spend time with people who...

who.... who WHAT? Seriously, do not leave me hanging like this. I even wore sweat pants most of the day instead of real pants or even jeans, and the only major purchase I made was socks and I didn't try to impress anyone, I swear! So why are you just trailing off like that?

It's the right day to spend time with people who... wear hats, like monkeys, know how to milk a goat? What? Should I be spending time with people who like Family Guy, who went to Harvard, who have tattoos?

Would someone please help me out here?

Too inert to... 9

You have much to give, but it might not be easy to overcome the inertia of negativity that currently restrains your thinking. Working harder may not be the answer now; persistence and a more positive outlook are what you need.

Oh. My. God. I didn't have just inertia of negativity today, I had backwards motion of negativity. What is wrong with me? It seriously took all my willpower today to think positively about my fabulous life. And that is whack. Hee hee, a little gangsta there.

So I was persistent and continued to think positively today even though my jeans fit me like a sausage casing and my back is frickin' killing me and I haven't heard back from any agents. Hooray for me!

It's not me, it's you 5

You've been accused of moodiness, but you pick up the vibes of the people around you. It's more important than ever that you're around happy people.

See! It's totally not my fault. I mean, how am I supposed to be nice to you when I am picking up your mean and nasty vibes? Shape up, people.

Round and round we go 9

A gift of money will add more balance and stability to your finances under the Taurus Moon.

Of course it would. Unfortunately I checked 6 different horoscopes for Pisces today and not one of them had advice on how to get someone to give me a gift of money.

Unless I'm supposed to give a gift of money. Though I don't see how that will add balance and stability to my finances. Still, I have plans to do it anyway. And I did get a call for a potential gig this weekend.

Interesting.

But will the clarity help me see through the political crap? 8

You are entering a phase of strength, clarity, and increasing confidence.

Well, hello me.

And I do feel that way. I'm thinking positive and all kinds of positive things are peeking their heads out of the ground and seeing if they want to stick around. But I'm watching the debate right now and McCain is already acting so snarky and talking so condescendingly that it's taking all my willpower not to throw my laptop at the TV.

Isn't there some kind of color I could be wearing to feel peaceful?

Yes, mom, I'm doing my homework 7

Your tarot card for this week is the Emperor, which means you should honor your responsibilities and commitments instead of succumbing to the temptation to let things slide.

Fine!

I'm trying to write and I did my frickin' exercises from the chiropractor but am not happy to hear that I am BREATHING wrong and apparently all these years of sucking in my gut to avoid looking 5 months pregnant has been messing with my back and contributed to this painful situation.

Seriously, how do you breathe incorrectly? All this time I thought that inhale-exhale pretty much covered it but apparently there's more involved than that. My ribcage was/is lifting too high and I'm breathing too shallow. Shallowly? Whatever, I'm just not doing it right. And if I'm not doing something right that my body should be doing naturally on its own I don't think that bodes too well for the things I'm actually trying to do.

So OF COURSE I'm tempted to just let things slide. They're already sliding on their own.

Can you hear me now? 3

If you venture out under this evening's destiny-oriented Pisces Moon, you'll experience a karmic connection.

I ventured out tonight to work in the concession stand at the sparsely-attended Plymouth Whalers game and if tonight has anything to do with karma - I wonder what the hell I did wrong. Someone please tell me that it is NOT my destiny to serve up fried food and $7 beer.

Though one customer did comment - after I checked his ID to make sure he was buying his alcoholic beverage legally - that I look 28. Yeah, yeah, I know he was lying or blind or stupid or trying to get his beer for free (like I even HAVE that kind of authority) but ...28! I am accepting it and keeping it and there is nothing you can do stop me.

I should really wear my glasses more often.

It's a wonderful life 8

The abundance surrounding you will become even more evident when you discover that the Universe has been moving you into a better place. (Aren't you glad you agreed to come along?) Practicing gratitude for your gifts will generate more of the same, so make a list of all the things you have to be thankful for.

OK, so yesterday I was supposed to keep my expectations low and today I'm expressing gratitude for being moved into a better place? Better than low expectations? WT...?

List of things I have to be thankful for: Family, friends, home, work, opportunities, fun, supportive and cute husband, my hysterical kids, skating carpool, wonderful in-laws, inspirational books, inspirational friends, supportive friends and family, published book, Ugg slippers, auditions, writing gigs, great hairdresser, friends that make me laugh until I cry, great people to work with, old friends....I could go on and on. And maybe I will.

So here I am in a better place. What am I supposed to do here?

You want what now? 7

Keeping your expectations low will enable you to avoid disappointment. Your ideals are still a bit skewed from the reality of a situation, but with perseverance, patience and wisdom, you can bring the two into alignment under today's Capricorn Moon.

How am I supposed to remain positive and believe that I'm capable of anything and keep my expectations low at the same time? Universe, I believe you are finally asking too much of me. I have spent the last few months working on positive thinking and believing that anything is possible and what are you telling me now? Anything is possible for everyone except for me? Not quite everything is possible, better not expect too much?

Too bad. I'm all positive now. I've got writing gigs and auditions and I refuse to try and align with anything close to disappointment. Of course, this refusal will probably lead to disappointment when the auditions don't pan out and the writing gigs don't pay as well as I'd like. I know, I know, at least I was warned.

How to...make a commercial about ice cream without getting to eat any 8

Chances are good that you're surrounded by fans and media now, but as soon as you can fit it in, start thinking about a title for the how-to book you'll feel eminently qualified to pen.

Shot a TV commercial this evening; don't know if that counts as surrounded by media but definitely feels close. And the how-to book, well I already have the title.

And when I got home there was an email waiting. A Cub Scout troop wants me to come talk about writing and working in the media. Wonder if I'll get paid in popcorn.

Am hoping this lasts through tomorrow morning as I have another audition and can use another gig.

Were the intrigue and the travel in my past life? 3

Lighting myrrh incense can coax a past life memory to the surface, and because Mars will move into karmic Scorpio today, you'll gain some surprising insights into how that lifetime is affecting you now.

I am soooooo glad I don't have any myrrh incense in the house because I'm pretty sure a past life memory would just freak me out. I don't mind karma or insights, even surprising ones, but I really don't need a mental image of me working as a maid or living in a hut with 10 kids in a time with no indoor plumbing or toothbrushes.

According to everything I've read when Mars moves into Scorpio it's all about ambition, travel, and intrigue. Ambition I've got, but my life is a little too suburban for any travel and intrigue. The closest thing to "intrigue" in my life is the obnoxious boy across the street who rings the doorbell and runs away and thinks I don't know that it's him. Though this evening I turned into Cranky Neighbor Lady and snuck around the back of my house and yelled "If you ring my doorbell again I will tell your parents!"

Daughter was at the front door when I yelled and when he and the other kids (who had probably goaded him into it) took off she yelled "You BETTER run!"

We are definitely a force to be reckoned with.

Maybe pilates would help 7

Flexibility, thinking on your feet, and the ability to accommodate the unexpected will be called for now. The pace is very quick. You will be pulled in many directions at once and will tend to scatter your forces, jumping from one thing to the next. Positively, you may come up with some fresh, original plan or insight that may seem crazy at first, but which is likely to be quite useful.

I definitely got all the scattered forces and crazy jumping around but am still waiting for the original plan or insight. There were good things happening, but good things that are going to take me out of my comfort zone and I feel...uncomfortable about that. But I guess that is the unexpected that I must accommodate.

Think I did a good job being flexible and thinking on my feet. But who really knows. I'm pulled in too many directions to be able to figure it out.

Don't you want me, baby? 1

Load up on the skepticism and apply it liberally to any 'great' new opportunity that comes your way. And remember that the harder someone pushes you to join in, the more likely it is that they have ulterior motives.

I feel like my life is a series of Seinfeld episodes. Today's episode is The Checks (#141, season 8 - where the cult of carpet cleaners doesn't want George) because I'm sitting her pouting that no one tried to pressure me into any 'great' new opportunities that weren't really great for me. No one pushed me to join anything! People, why don't you want me in your freaky little clubs?

Today WAS the kind of day where little things just seemed to work themselves out. It stopped raining so I could go for a walk. When I called for a hair appointment the receptionist asked "Would you like to come in on Saturday?" and my Book Club got postponed until next week - when I won't have to leave early because of carpool duty.

I liked today. But after reading my horoscope I feel like I'm missing out on something. Perhaps there would have been a great story about someone trying to talk me into running for office or something.

Bahahahahahahahaha!